The Fantastic Four: First Steps

Movie night was a bit different this week. It was my younger daughter's last night with us before heading back to college, and my husband was watching with us, so we ended up watching a more recent/mainstream movie. It's been a while since I've watched a Marvel movie, but I usually enjoy them.

This movie is an alternate Earth where the Fantastic Four has to deal with Galactus. Sue Storm is pregnant, and a lot of the movie deals with Reed freaking out about whether or not the baby will be normal. Well, when the Silver Surfer appears, they decide to go into space and confront Galactus.

I had too many questions. At least that's what I was told. The clothing was more retro, which is fine, so we're talking about different historic happenings, right? But it's still called the United States. Putting that aside, the Statue of Liberty was in New York. Would that still be there? I honestly don't know how the multiverse stuff works.

I think the biggest issue I had was with Galactus himself. He was in a ship, which was something I didn't understand, but then he was destroying entire worlds. But then he gets to New York and is only as tall as a skyscraper. It was a bit underwhelming. I felt like they nerfed him. But on the plus side, I did get to see a baby act as an AED device!

The movie was ok, but I think I prefer the older one. I definitely prefer the 2007 surfer, Doug Jones. He had more presence in my opinion. In this movie, I liked the story between Torch and the Surfer, but that didn't end up going anywhere. It was entertaining enough, but The Fantastic Four has never been one of my favorite teams in Marvel. If I want to experience this group, I'm all in on the 1994 Fantastic Four movie.

Hercules - 1983

When I learned there was a version of Hercules starring our favorite Hulk, Lou Ferrigno, the whole family was on board. Well, most of the family...

I don't even know how to start. We're in space (not where I thought we'd be, but ok), and there's a pot. The pot breaks apart and makes planets. Then, the gods have a discussion and decide that to combat evil in the world, they're going to make one really strong, good man. They send him to earth and 4000 years later he possesses a child and grows into strong man. Both his parents are killed, he throws a bear into space, fights robots, and wipes out an entire civilization. That's the short version. 

The long version would take way too long to get into. This movie was not what I expected at all. I saw so many strange things that didn't make any sense. I think everyone's favorite part was the bear. I'm not going to explain anything from the movie. I think anyone of a certain age should watch it. Why of a certain age? Well...

The outfits. Oh my gosh. I don't know who made those or who designed them, but they had to be men. The women who wore them should have been paid extra. Some of them more than extra. You'd think with all the people on set, someone would speak up and say, "Hey, guys. Hera over there is popping out of her shirt. Let's fix that." And I feel like they could have found some bigger shells for Cassiopeia.

Overall, we all loved it. My husband said it was stupid, but I'm not fooled. He was laughing along with the rest of us. It had been a rough day for some of us, and this was just what we needed. Guess what? There's a sequel! The Adventures of Hercules. I'm going to see if we can watch that one in the future. That sounds good to me! Good Movie!

King of the Zombies - 1941

This title was next up on the horror film list. We had my younger daughter here for Thanksgiving break, so we made her suffer with us.

A plane is flying over a Caribbean island when it receives a strange signal and crashes. They trudge through the jungle and find a pretty swanky house. Inside is an "Austrian" doctor who is really racist and rude. The crash victims have an African American "servant," and the doctor is insisting Jeff stay below stairs. And that's where he sees the zombies!

Unfortunately, no one believes him. It takes a while for the other morons to get on board that Jeff is actually seeing something. Later, one of the guys magically gets a jungle fever and dies off screen. You know what that means? ZOMBIE!

But they're really not. Everyone has been hypnotized. Also, the doctor is a Nazi that has kidnapped an Admiral. He's trying to voodoo link the information out of the Admiral's head. The natives sing a song about cocoa beans to try and establish the link between the Admiral and the doctor's niece, but Jeff and one of the guys shows up to thwart him. The dead zombie guy resists his hypnotism and backs the doctor into a pit. He takes a bunch of bullets, but I guess he's fine.

This movie was super strange, but it wasn't the worst thing we've seen lately. It was kind of funny to hear my daughter comment the movie was bad, and Mom and I were trying to explain to her it wasn't that bad. She just had no idea. It's amazing how your expectations change after you watch a certain amount of garbage. Big shoutout to Dick Purcell (Muffin Top Captain America) who starred as the dead man/zombie hypnotized shot guy.

Jeff was a hero and a doofus. He wouldn't scream at a time when others would be able to see the zombies, he went along with the doctor when he knew the man was a problem, and he acted like he was hypnotized until the cook lady gave him some salt and told him he was fine. But he was also responsible for alerting the others to the wife wandering around as a zombie. If nothing else, we got a catchy new tune for our voodoo library. We already had "Cherry Wine," and now we have "Cocoa Beans, I Need Cocoa Beans!"

Side note: Were the "zombies" sending out the radio signals?

Spellbound (Passing Clouds) - 1941

Next up in our horror list was this strange movie. The title card was just the words "Passing Clouds" over a pyramid. It also had a couple other titles, but the movie is only based on one book: The Necromancers by Robert Hugh Benson.

I couldn't tell what anyone's names were except for a few people, so I'm going to refer to them by what we were calling them throughout the film.

Our main man, Lenny, falls in love with Amy. She's only a shopgirl, so Lenny's mother isn't fond of the idea of her baby boy marrying below his social status. Fortunately for her, Amy has a frail constitution and magically dies. I was curious why the doctor was just upstairs with the body for a few minutes for no reason. "She passed away a few minutes ago." And you're just now informing the family? What were you doing up there, sir?!

Anyway, Lenny takes it pretty hard and gets sucked into the spiritualist community. The woman who was lined up to be his bride (mother approved) is hanging out with Lenny and trying to keep him sane. Her name is Diana, and she just hangs out around him, but we weren't sure if she lived in the house or nearby.

Lenny goes into a trance and channels Amy, and then he hears her voice through a medium named Vincent. Now he's really all in. But he has a friend who calls in Mr. Catgut. Now Mr. Catgut is the hero of the movie and a real pro. He tries to tell Lenny that Vincent is messing around with demons, and Lenny shouldn't go to the séance, especially if they're trying to materialize something. Of course Lenny is a moron and doesn't listen, so now he's possessed. Diana saves him with the power of love, and the groundskeeper pushes his wheelbarrow into the sunset (well it was actually the sunrise, but potato/potato). I'm not kidding. That's how the movie ended.

I started out ready to make fun of this movie like I normally do. I couldn't understand the women because they were talking too fast, and the groundskeeper had a marbles-in-the-mouth accent. But as time went on, I liked that the movie was approaching the spiritualist angle in a different way. It wasn't just ghosts or fakes, it was the way it presented the possibility that dabbling with the spiritual world could open a door to things you don't want coming through.

But then the end happened. I seriously had to track down this book. It was written in 1909, so I knew it had to be in the public domain. There's no way (I hope) that the author of the book wrote that ending. Lenny comes home possessed and freaks out Diana. She calls Mr. Catgut and then convinces him to leave her alone in a room with the demon possessed man, while she says a prayer for him. She then falls asleep until morning and then WOW! Instant demon removal! And all because Diana loves Lenny...what?!

Seriously, I was all on board toward the end of this one. The actor was doing a great job acting possessed. His eyes were creepy, and the maniacal laughter was spot on. I was looking forward to the showdown between the forces of good (theologian Catgut) and evil (demon possessed Lenny), but no. We don't even get to find out if there were any consequences for Vincent since Lenny touched the demon ghost. It was just frustrating at that point. Another movie that had potential, and they ruined it by shoehorning in a completely unnecessary romance. But I will discover if it was the book's fault. It's in my "to be read" pile waiting for me...

Side note: Props to Hay Petrie for his portrayal of Mr. Cathcart (Catgut) - he made the movie worth it.

Men in War - 1957

I can't remember how this movie ended up on my radar. I think it had to do with it being about the Korean War, because I haven't seen any movies about that particular time. Anyway, I had this on my laptop, and I'm running out of space, so I needed to watch it to clear up some room.

This movie revolves around a group of soldiers trapped in a valley and surrounded by the enemy. They believe they just need to make it to the top of the hill to reconnect with friendlies, but they've been unable to reach them over the radio. One of the men has been killed without anyone hearing anything, and they decide it's time to move.

They load up the contents of the destroyed truck they were in and start walking. Eventually, a sergeant comes motoring by in a Jeep with a shell-shocked colonel. It takes some convincing, but they join forces and make their way to the hill, only to find out it's currently in the hands of the enemy. 

This movie was intense and depressing. Only three people make it, so getting attached to anyone is probably a bad idea. It's based on a book called Day Without End by Van Van Praag, but that was set during WWII and was related to the Normandy campaign.

The movie itself was a bit of a slog, but I understand what it was trying to do. Montana was a complex character, which made him my favorite. He was a super jerk to everyone, but he was just trying to protect the colonel, who he looked up to as a father. I was also happy to see Vic Morrow (from Combat! - a show I'm very slowly getting through), but he's playing a MUCH different character here.

I'm neutral on this movie. It had some good moments, but overall, I wasn't really sucked into the story. I didn't feel like I got to know the characters at all, except for the main 3 or 4. I'll just stay on the fence.

Invisible Ghost - 1941

Hopes were high when we turned this movie on. The title was horror-ish, and it starred our good pal, Bela Lugosi! Let's see what the movie had in store for us, shall we?

Before I start the review, I'm going to do things a little differently. Normally, after a movie, I head to the internet and download the movie poster for the review. When I do that, I read a bit about the movie. Sometimes I learn interesting tidbits about the filming, and other times I learn things that help me understand what I watched. This one was so confusing, I'm going to go through my impressions before looking anything up about the movie.

Murders are happening around the home of Mr. Kessler. His wife disappeared a few years ago, but he believes that one day she'll return. In reality, she ran away with another man, got into a car crash, got brain damage, and is living in a cellar under the barn. She's being fed by the groundskeeper who found her after the wreck, but she emerges from the cellar every once in a while, and that's when the murders happen.

You'd think she's the one responsible, but it's really Bela. When Mrs. Kessler stands beneath the window and stares at the house, Bela "senses" it and falls into a trance. He curls up his hand, and tracks down a victim to play peek-a-boo with before strangling them with his cape, robe or sometimes his bare hands. There were times during the movie I was wondering if she really was a ghost since she was outside in the rain, but she was perfectly dry. The rain was streaming down the window, so she wasn't protected by an overhang. But then, in the next moment, her face was wet. Then, she was dry again. Whatever.

Then we have Ralph. Poor Ralph. That man was executed for a murder he didn't commit, and no one really acknowledged that. His brother came from South America to find out what really happened, but at the end, no one mentioned that "hey, we really did have the wrong guy, eh?" Also, they were trying to pin the murders on the poor butler. And the whole psychiatry exam was the weirdest thing I've ever seen. Let's sit him down in a chair and simply ask him, "Do you think Mr. Kessler is insane?" How is that a test of the butler's sanity? So weird. 

And nothing made sense. Why did Bela go into a trance when his wife was near? Why did it make him kill people? Why did his wife die once she got into the house? She'd been near him before, so why at that moment does she die, and why does that moment break the spell over Bela? And why did lightning break the spell? And why were there no invisible ghosts?!

Every person in this movie was awful. The police railroaded poor Ralph. All they had was circumstantial evidence, and he supposedly had the best lawyer in the county. I have my doubts. The brother was an idiot, and his suspenders made his pants too high. The coroner couldn't tell when a person was dead. The cops watching the house never saw the woman in a bathrobe. The daughter was useless. The only helpful person was the butler. Evans was the man, and he's the real hero. And they tried pinning the murder on him!

I went to look into the movie and found nothing of note. I think if you're in the mood for a strange nonsensical Bela movie, you might be entertained by this one. I think The Devil Bat is much better though and would recommend it over this one easily.

The Great Escape - 1963

I've been meaning to watch this movie for the longest time, but the length of it was a serious consideration. It's also one of those movies I feel like I need to be in the mood for.

This movie is based on the true story of an organized breakout from Stalag III during WWII. The Germans are tired of POWs breaking out, and their brilliant plan is to put them all in the same camp and to keep track of them. Not surprisingly, the men immediately start to plan an escape.

I'm not going to mention much more of the plot. It's an escape movie. It's not 100% accurate by any means, but there are places it got things right. Three men escaped, and fifty were executed (just not in the way portrayed). The three tunnels were named Tom, Dick and Harry, but the locations were different. The Americans were involved in helping with the setup for the escape, but they were moved from the camp before the attempt. The motorcycle chase never happened (shocking!).

I kept thinking parts of this movie felt familiar, but I know I've never seen it before. I tried to think if maybe my dad had it on TV, but I can't be sure. I don't think I'm mixing it up with Stalag 17. I also tried to check and see if I'd already read the book, but I don't have a review for it, either. I have no idea!

I did like this movie, and I want to read more now. Two of the three escapees wrote memoirs, and I'm going to keep and eye out for those as well as the Paul Brickhill book that collected stories and tells his side of helping with the setup. He was unable to participate in the escape due to fear that his claustrophobia would affect the mission, so he helped in other ways.

Either way you look at it, this was a bold move made by many men. The cost wasn't measured in money, but in lives. Was it worth it to risk so many lives to set three free? I don't want to speak for the men, but since they worked so hard to get out, they knew those risks, and they were prepared to take them. It was a good movie, and now I'm adding to my pile of things I want to read...again. One thing about it - I'll never be at a loss for something to read! Good Movie!

Side Note: It was nice to see Donald Pleasence in a role other than a villain for once. I'm not sure I've seen that before!

The Ghost Train - 1941

Ok, I am fully convinced the person that put together this horror list either wasn't paying attention or didn't watch some of these movies. I'll explain later.

A group of people misses their connection because a moron stops the entire train when his hat flies out the window. This man reminded me of Kay Kiser from You'll Find Out. He even looked like him, too. The weather turns bad, and the group decides they're spending the night in the station. The stationmaster warns them the building is haunted by a train, and they should beware. He leaves, and shenanigans ensue. The strange man (I'm calling him Shaggy), makes jokes and eventually pulls out a record player and starts singing a song. Enter the hero of the film, Richard. He sacrificed his game of chess to spare everyone more inane singing by throwing the record player outside on the train tracks. What a hero!

About halfway through the movie, the stationmaster comes back and croaks on the floor. Then a dramatic woman bursts through the door and claims she simply must be at the station. The ghost train is coming tonight! Her brother is trying to get her out of there, and the others are trying to help her. When the ghost train comes roaring by, it becomes clear that not everything is as it seems.

This was not a horror movie. This was an episode of Scooby Doo before Scooby Doo existed. There's a conspiracy to keep people away from the station because it's being used to smuggle weapons to the Nazis. They've come up with the Ghost Train myth to keep people out of the area, and they even have a ghost! Also, I'm giving credit for the solving of the mystery to Richard, because I love that he punched Teddy (I guess he's the Scooby in this scenario?) in the face. I wish he could've punched Shaggy, but it was glorious enough when he demolished the man's music. When Teddy wakes up, he's upset they won't be there when the Ghost Train comes back so they can expose the villains, but they would have been outnumbered had they stayed. I'm still calling it a Scooby Doo episode. I mean, people did die, so I'm calling it Hardcore Scooby Doo. Also, they left the bird lady at the station. That was a bit rude.

Those Nazi sympathizers would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for that stupid meddling moron and his hat...

The Devil Commands - 1941

Next up in our horror movies is The Devil Commands starring The Grinch. Actually, the next one was The Face Behind the Mask, but I'd seen it before. It was a real movie, and it was sad. I remembered I'd seen it partway through, but it's not that long, and it was too late to turn back. When it ended, it wasn't that late, my oldest daughter was home, and we needed to watch a cheesy movie. Our hopes were high with this one.

The Grinch is doing weird things with a balloon-shaped helmet to measure brain waves. He feels like eventually, we'll be able to know other people's thoughts and communicate with each other. So far, all I saw was some seismograph-looking peaks on a piece of paper. He also hooks up his wife, and they're all agog at how her peaks are so much higher than the previous guy. WOW!

A car accident kills the wife, and The Grinch goes nutty. One night, he accidentally turns on his machine and part of his wife's pattern appears on the wall. His friend, (?) Karl, convinces him to go to a medium, Mrs. Walters. She's a charlatan, but apparently, she's also creating electricity? So, when The Grinch hooks her up to his balloon, she continues a seismograph that's identical to The Grinch's wife. When Karl is added, he's zapped and basically turned into an Igor.

After that, The Grinch moves away and starts doing really weird stuff. He starts stealing bodies and putting balloon helmets on them so he can create a spirit tornado to contact his wife. I think. It's all very confusing to be honest. The end is just insanity.

I think the thing that shocked me the most about this movie is that it's based on a book. The Edge of Running Water by William Sloane somehow spawned this movie. I have to say, I am extremely interested to learn how any book could create something this strange. I didn't understand so many things about this movie. How did the dead people help the tornado? Why was Mrs. Walters so invested? She wasn't a real medium, and she said she was only doing it for money. Once she found out she was electrical, she was all in. She was a bulldog protecting The Grinch. 

Overall, I'm on the fence with this one. It was so confusing, I'm not sure it was entertaining. The dead people around the table were something. How did The Grinch go from thinking that he needed live, conscious people to substituting dead folk? And it worked? I found a Kindle version of the book, and I'll keep an eye on it. I'm glad it wasn't one of those out of print books that only has copies circulating with unreasonable prices. I hate that.

You'll Find Out - 1940

This movie is the last one in the list for the year 1940. I didn't know who Kay Kiser was, but I was optimistic when I saw Bela, the Grinch and Peter Lorre in the credits. How bad could it be?!

The answer? Very bad. So bad that I think it's one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Not only is it one of those weird comedies that's trying to be somewhat "scary" at the same time, but it is part musical. And it's a comedy musical, which is probably my least favorite kind of musical.

Kay Kiser (he's playing himself) is taking his band to play at a young lady's 21st birthday party. I think that's weird, but whatever. They all drive up to the creepy mansion in a big car, but somehow all their gear and props are there as well. Also in the house are the Grinch as a judge and a Prince that can make contact with the other side (Bela). Janis has also invited a professor to her birthday party to expose Bela as a fraud since he's been bleeding her aunt of the family's money for a while now. Little does she realize the creepy face that peered into her window (Peter Lorre) was the "professor."

This movie was hard to watch. The "jokes" were horrific, the musical numbers went on forever, they put hair on a dog (a wig with bangs), and the séance was hard to watch. I mean, if they were trying to disprove the medium, why didn't they try to tackle the "ghost" or pull down the floaty things? The dog disappeared for half the movie, and when he appeared again, his tail had paint on it. How? The paint was in a petri dish-looking thing.

The end of this thing was insane. Two of the villains had guns and one had dynamite! I mean, a bridge blew up earlier (no one believed lightning hit it), so it wasn't shocking there was dynamite in the area. But why are we threatening people with it? Anyway, the villains get blown up, but Kay Kiser and his band of goobers survive to perform one last time (we skipped it). And what happened to the poor real professor who popped up for two seconds? Pain. All we felt was pain...

You'll find out how much patience you have...

Death Note (anime series) - 2006

This series has been on Tubi for a while, and my husband and I have been watching it together. It's 37 episodes, and has subtitles, so it took us a little bit to get through it. It's based on a manga.

Light is at school when he finds a notebook. That object will change the course of the rest of his life. Touching it introduces him to Ryuk, a Shinigami, who tells him that writing the name of a person in the notebook will result in that person's death. Now, Light starts to feel the power he holds, and it becomes more and more important for him to fulfill what he sees as his destiny: a world without evil. And he'll eliminate anyone who gets in his way.

I loved this series. Light is in a chess match with someone who matches his skills. The back and forth between these two was so impressive. The constant twists and turns reminded me of Monster. The story is nothing similar; it was the suspense and amount of times I was sitting on the edge of my seat. There were numerous times we had to watch the next episode because of the cliffhanger we were left with.

I'm definitely trying to track down this manga. I don't know how close the series followed the manga, but I'd like to get some clarification on a few things, particularly at the end. I believe my favorite character was the Shinigami Ryuk. He loved his apples! Good Show!

The Devil Bat - 1940

Next up in our horror movie list was The Devil Bat. It sounded familiar, but I couldn't find a review for it. When I was watching it, parts of it seemed familiar, but then again, other parts seemed fresh. I honestly couldn't tell you if I'd seen this before, or it's just following the formula so closely that it reminds me of other movies of the era! 

Bela Luhosi stars in this one. He's a mad scientist who has been making creams and such for a beauty company for years. He sold out early, so now he's jealous of the wealth the family has made off his hard work. His solution? Zap some bats and make them attracted to aftershave. Then, give it to various members of the family who has wronged him and watch them die!

This movie was hilarious. The bats were zapped, I suppose, but all the "fireworks" were happening on the side of the room, so we weren't sure how hanging a bat in the middle of the room made it grow. Also, Bela had more than one secret passage, and that would be well and good, but when someone is watching you, they just have to watch you go through both doors since the first one basically led to the second. And can we talk about the noise the bats made? I don't think it was a real mammal noise (they kept pointing out that bats were mammals). It sounded more like a woman shrieking. 

I am so proud of myself. I recognized a couple of the actors. I can't remember what happened yesterday, but I recognized Dave O'Brien from Captain Midnight. I also spotted John Davidson and correctly connected him to the Adventures of Captain Marvel (Shazam). Looking into it, Davidson was also in Muffin Top Captain America, but I'm still impressed I remembered the connections!

If you love old movies with terrible effects, this is right up your alley. At one point, they're using a stuffed bat to create a picture for the newspaper. That thing looked a lot more realistic than anything they used for the Devil Bat. And it was Made in Japan! I'm not explaining that joke. If you want in on it, watch the movie! Bring a friend and some popcorn. Bela is on point with his "I'm the villain" faces, and I think my favorite part was the way the bat was thwarted from getting to Mary. I think Mom liked when the fake bat exploded. Are you intrigued yet?! Good Movie!

Jin-Roh - The Wolf Brigade - 1999

This was one of those random picks I found on Tubi. The poster for it drew me in (the second picture below), and the summary was interesting. I'm always drawn in by alternate history, especially when it's done well.

Riots are getting out of control in Japan. A young girl is transporting a bomb when she is trapped in the storm sewer by the Kerberos, a special unit with helmets that give them red eyes. The one in front of the terrorist watches as she detonates the bomb. After that, his ability to perform his duties is questioned. He meets a young woman who looks strikingly like the girl who died, and they form a bond. But there's more going on than what anyone sees on the surface.

I was really interested in the story. It had a lot of twists and turns. It reminded me of a miniseries I watched a long time ago called The Game (2014). That one's based in the Cold War, but it has the twists and turns and the surprise ending. I didn't really notice a lot of details that would point to an alternate history. Apparently, the movie is based on the first part of a manga, so maybe deeper into the story, it would have more of those alternate history details.

There was an English release of the manga. It was called Hellhounds, but when it was ridiculously hard to find, I had to throw in the towel. And the ones I saw were insanely priced. I refuse to pay close to $30 for a 36-page comic. There were 6 issues total, but unfortunately, I don't think I'm going to experience this one in manga form. Anyway, I did like this movie. The Red Riding Hood story paired with the Wolf Brigade was a cool detail, and I really liked this one. Good Movie!

Theatrical Poster

Tubi Poster